Here's another day from Baba's life which I thought you should read. It's just a story from the myriad of stories we are always writing, as we exist. Every story has some significance no matter how small & unfinished it maybe.
t is one of those moments that you feel guilty, for everything you notice. A painful, hurting luxury one can afford to indulge after eating, quenching hunger and thirst.
"what am I supposed to do actually in life?" this question started to echo from one part of my brain to another, when I found out for yet another time that it's impossible to make everybody happy at the same time. Whatever you do, or refrain from doing, will hurt someone or the other.
You don't want to, but it happens. It is impossible to make things happen in another way, under another set of rules. You can stop making a sound, but you cannot stop an echo. You have to wait till it dies out..
As I asked this question, throwing it to the wind I have this wrong hope that the wind will carry it to places you haven't thought of.
It's all about survival. It's a battle. Yet even when you prepare yourself for a battle, you find out there is no code which limits the battle.
Right from school to walking the pavements picking up crumbs, I was taught so many things. To equip myself with the necessary informations so that I can live when I grow up.
But it's not only about learning. More and more. You are impressed by a unwritten "code" - how you use this knowledge.
Society as an institution survives each day by comission and omission too. To comit what is correct, and omitting everything which is not. It's not only Action but also the calibrated Inaction that makes our tomorrow,.
Here is where the emotional fool, the pseudo idealist trips again. You find that it's just not about reaching the finishing line.
A luminous voice tells me that it's about everybody. Everybody is doing the same thing as you are. Struggling to survive.
Still you see that struggling to survive is not only to stride ahead.
It's also about making sure that others don't. You shove and push others who are running in the race. It is Cheating. They cheat you. They exploit your idea of a healthy competition.
Is it a race which doesn't have any rules? No gold standard is there that will ensure that it is fair, no cheating is allowed? Are our lives so unscrupulous?
The voice assures me - no cheating is not part of your survival. But saving yourself from being cheated is. Life is not unfair. It always leaves an option for you.
That figures. To save yourself from being cheated is part of the struggle to survive. It's not just a job. It's a part of your existence. Do everything to survive. To survive famines and psunamis, to survive holocausts and mass genocides to survive to keep your identity in a family or outside that, a community. It is here where the question 'WHY' loses objectivity, it becomes a subjective exercise. There can't be no answer ever because the question itself is flawed. I can't go to Wikipedia or Google search just because nobody answers my question. It's a flawed question. We all have to fend for ourselves. That is of course a different story, a different life. You have to look inwards, not outside for help, for. Moments which give you courage, direction and focus to whatever you are doing.
I guess I got part of the answer I was seeking. I have to find the rest myself. Doing that is Survival.
Sent from my BlackBerry --------------------------------------------- Dr.Anirban Chaudhuri, Physician, Mumbai, India. http://jogyou963.blogspot.com Live Life on your own terms
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